{"id":11641,"date":"2020-03-25T18:10:00","date_gmt":"2020-03-25T17:10:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/intombi.de\/blog\/know-how-myths-and-important-tips-about-sexuality\/"},"modified":"2020-06-07T18:18:58","modified_gmt":"2020-06-07T16:18:58","slug":"know-how-myths-and-important-tips-about-sexuality","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/intombi.de\/en\/blog\/know-how-myths-and-important-tips-about-sexuality\/","title":{"rendered":"Know-how, myths and important tips about sexuality"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\n
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At the girls*evening in the anyway it is not only hanging and kicking together, but also talking about love, sex and tenderness from time to time. Photo: Danny Frede<\/span><\/p><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n\n\n

And suddenly everything is a bit different somehow:<\/strong> puberty – the time of growing up – is often a confusing but also super exciting time. Discovering one’s own sexuality, the first attempts in love life, Do’s and Don\u2019ts<\/strong> – and sometimes just that can be too much, right? This is exactly what we want to talk about this week!<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

We have put together exciting and important know-how and some valuable tips<\/strong> for you. With the help of our experts<\/strong> who live out their passion in the field of sexuality<\/strong>. With this, many of your questions and uncertainties<\/strong> in the jungle of feelings of your own sexuality<\/strong> can be clarified!<\/h4>\n\n\n\n\n\n

Myths, Do’s & Don\u2019ts and the first time – sex educationist Barbara explains<\/h2>\n\n\n\n\n\n

“Sexual identity, just like personal identity, is never finished or completed! <\/strong>These are all processes that start at puberty but are never finished and are not static. So sexual identity can and may change and evolve at any time.”<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Our expert Barbara Schiller (37 years old from Cologne)<\/strong> will tell you the great myths about sex<\/strong>. She is a sex pedagogue and works in the Cologne Centre of pro familia<\/strong>. Sex education can be studied for finishing with a Master degree. pro familia advises all over Germany on sexuality and pregnancy regardless of age, sex, religious affiliation or sexual orientation, anonymously if desired<\/strong>. All consultants are subject to confidentiality.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n

The right to sexual self-determination<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

“Basically, <\/strong>everyone in Germany<\/strong> from the age of 14 has the right to have sex<\/strong>, if you really want to, feel ready for it and have the desire to do so.<\/strong> And if that is the case and you do it for these reasons and with the motive, I can only say, wonderful, then do it! Because that is the right to sexual self-determination!”<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Unfortunately, there are still myths around the topic of sex, which exert great pressure on girls and young women.<\/strong> Often this results in a distorted picture of sexual power relations<\/strong> in which the sexual self-determination of young women in particular is denied or given little consideration – and this is exactly what we want to talk about here. Your sexual self-determination is your right and only you decide how and what you want. And of course, in agreement with your partner.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n

Sex educationist Barbara Schiller explains the myths:hymen, the first time, masturbation and pornography. Click on “<\/strong>Read more“<\/strong> to learn more.<\/a>Weiterlesen<\/a><\/div><\/div>

\u25ba The hymen<\/strong> does not exist in the way it is the common assumption! You cannot tell whether someone is still a virgin or not. The so-called hymen is actually a wreath of mucous membrane that is more or less elastic and stretchy. The wreath does not go away, not after the first sex, not even after several births. Besides, it doesn’t have to hurt the first time! It creates pressure and fear for many young women, including when it comes to (no) sex before marriage. This myth keeps power structures alive and clearly shows how girls are scared so that they get inhibitions, self-determined and with curiosity to discover their sexuality.\u25ba Masturbation: <\/strong>Girls and women generally, but especially their sexual organs, take a critical view of themselves and with shame, and they are often told that they should not live out their lust. But girls can confidently say YES to lust and they can also satisfy themselves! And the advantage of masturbation is that during sex you know better what you like, what is good and works well, and then it is all the more fun to try it out together. \u00a0\u25ba Unrealistic portrayal in pornography:<\/strong> Young girls are often given passivity during sexual acts and men that they have to take over the active part. Pornography also contributes to this. Because pornography shows only a small part of the many sexual dimensions and often leads to great pressure for young women, you would have to have it or that the genital organs would have to look exactly like the actresses. And that is not the case. \u25ba The first time: <\/strong>From a purely statistical point of view, it takes place for the first time later than in the past decades. Namely between 16 and 17 years. It is not premature, it is a misconception that is not true. Rather, it is that girls are less likely to say that they had their first time because they are afraid of being considered a “bitch”. You should never be ashamed of sexuality, because it is something really beautiful! <\/p><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n\n

Drawing clear boundaries is important – but not so easy either<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

But if you, no matter what age, feel unready, don’t feel like it or you just have a ‘strange’ feeling about it, it is very important that you say no and draw your clear line!<\/strong> And that’s totally okay<\/strong>! Our expert will give you tips<\/strong> on this:<\/p>\n\n\n\n